I had to do an article on arranged marriages for my office website. I have been thinking of doing it for sometime now, but once I got down to work I just couldn’t write anything. There was so much in my mind but I couldn’t put words to my thoughts, I wondered why. Then I realised it is a kind of a topic where I can state my opinion and not just give some facts like in the year 1700 BC Indians decided to arrange marriages, before that marriages were arranged too but in that particular century it was a conscious decision. It’s like nobody knows why marriages are arranged by parents or elders, why not just like the other animals on planet earth once human kids grow up they are free to go around and mark their territory.
But I guess I just know the reason why it is different for us humans. We are such crazy species with all these traditions and regulations we still do not behave ourselves, think what it would be like if we were on par with the other animals. The other poor species would have prayed to whatever supreme power they pray to for another planet far away from Earth.
What’s all the hoopla about marriage in the first place? If you are the kind who is not scared of commitment then arranged or love marriage you are going to work at it. And if you are the types who gets a cold feet by just thinking about commitment and all you seek is the initial euphoria that one feels when one is attracted to somebody, then boss love will very soon fly out of the window whether you are married or not. So it boils down to this arranged or love it works if you want it to work.
And what makes us think that we are making the choice to marry someone if it’s a love marriage and vice versa if it’s arranged. Somebody somewhere has written a script for us and has decided the cast too and then sent us down here to just playact. So whether we meet our life partner through parents, friends, matrimonial, in a pub, in the office, on a bus stop, in an elevator, however and wherever, somebody has arranged this meeting. So stop thinking too much, if you wanna get married go ahead do it, if you don’t then please do not even for your parents or society or any other such silly reasons.
Either ways it should be bliss.
14 comments:
Precisely my thoughts my friend. Some people have all the wrong reasons for getting married and love does not even figure on the list!
God created love... marriage is man-made.
Ditto Seema!
@lux...
so what is ur decision :), to marry or NOT to marry :D
Atta girl Lux, either way it should be bliss....Amen :)
Seema - wah wah
DJ - Ditto :-)
Kon ?? - What do u think? :D
Pulse - Shukriya Meharbaan Kadardaan
my thinking was in CAPITAL letters :)
vaise mere sochne se kya woh sach hoga ??
Kon ?? - ur thinking is loud!
tumhari soch hai, tumhi jaano. ;-)
ohh talk about cold feet...i can relate to that so well...hehe
btw...i think love is a highly over-rated thing .
quote " true love is like ghosts, everyone talks about it, but very few have actually seen it "
am always lost wen it comes to marriage - arranged n love and everything related to this!!!
i agree ..with u .nothing works on its own .one should make it work.that requires efforts and sacrifices.who has the patience or commitment for that nowadays? we broke up ..why ? it did not work out..so simple and escapist ...arranged or love ..i believe a marraige should be successful
Hmmm... scared of committment or not, arranged marriages scare the shit out of me. I mean imagine living (forever) with someone who you've just met a couple of weeks ago. Its a scary thought alright!
read it somewhere - marraiges are made in heaven but husbands are made in hell.. :):) personally i would get the guy to sign a document stating he has entered my insane world at his own risk.. baad mein mach mach nahi mangta..
arranged or otherwise, marriage was supposed to mean a new beginning, but is soon being redefined as a lead up to the end.
Marriage means both an end and a new beginning.. depending upon how one sees it :) it limits if not ends the freedom as some ppl put it.. on the other hand it brings with it a sense of belonging and responsibility towards someone who is going to be an important person in ur life.. And i guess the latter weigh more when u think of joys a marriage bring.. though i am not married yet, i perceive marriage in this light only :)
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